FOR NOW

Hair dark with wetness sticks to the ceramic of the tub. 
Blue inhaled smoke tugs at the inside of the lungs. 
The surface of the water breaks around the knees, 
They feel exposed and isolated just like you. 

Submerge. 

Submerge with all the heaviness you feel, 
Just let it pull you down. 
And once your vision blurs, 
And once you find you can no longer draw a breath
Release the scream that rolls around like pebbles in your chest
And let it bubble up, away from the constricting pressure. 

Then, when the water cools to an uncomfortable squeeze, 
When it pulls all the dirt and hurt and tension from within you,

Rise up.

And watch the droplets of remaining pain roll off you oozing skin and shatter on the floor. 

You’re clean. 
For now you’re clean.